Note: This article is from blogger Greg Faxon, who gives us 3 reasons to stop trying to find our purpose in life.
Three reasons to stop searching for purpose
1. It Is Nothing but a Myth
The biggest challenge I find with the notion of a 'life's purpose' is that it's often unattainable for most, or at least not in the way it's typically perceived. Claiming there's a single reason for one's existence is akin to asserting there's only one perfect match for someone. Life doesn't adhere to such absolutes. Rather, it offers opportunities relevant to the present.
Dismissing this notion risks a loss of perspective. The idea of life's purpose may have sprung from a sense of faith, wherein faith's effectiveness lies in providing meaning and direction. It's consoling to embrace the belief that our existence holds a specific purpose.
When we insist on the necessity of having a clear purpose for contentment, it often leaves individuals feeling a profound void until they uncover that specific purpose. This misconception is prevalent in the self-improvement sphere.
I've personally experienced a prolonged sense of inadequacy due to my lack of clarity about life's purpose. However, studies reveal a contradiction: the relentless pursuit of happiness paradoxically results in feelings of misery. Similarly, the quest for one's purpose often yields dissatisfaction instead of the intended fulfillment.
2. It Yields Contradictory Results
Waiting around for that one perfect thing in life isn't worth your while. Even if there's only one ideal goal for you, investing your time waiting for it to suddenly appear is simply a waste of time.
When reflecting on the time I dedicated to searching for my purpose, I now see it could have been better utilized by taking action. Purpose doesn't materialize suddenly in life. Rather, it necessitates infusing life with meaning through exploration and concerted effort. The same principle applies to discovering passion, often synonymous with purpose.
In her article "How to Find Your Passion," American entrepreneur Marie Forleo emphasizes, "Clarity emerges from engagement, not just contemplation." Self-improvement shouldn't impede progress, and understanding oneself best comes through data collection, often achieved through experimentation.
For instance, imagine finding your way through a forest and encountering a crossroads. Would you sit and scrutinize a few meters of each path? Unlikely. Instead, you'd intuitively select the path that feels right, aware that you could adjust the course based on new information. It's not about impulsive actions but rather starting with movement, as most people can sense if they're on the wrong track.
3. It Is Unchangeable
The idea of a 'single perfect thing' is limiting as life and goals evolve. Being fixated on one goal makes us inflexible. I believe in staying open and flexible, especially in youth. Trying to define a lifelong goal in your twenties can be restrictive and limit other opportunities.
Creating a universally applicable life message seems almost unattainable. Attempts often lack real significance. Some aspire to satisfaction, continuous growth, or helping others, but aren't these aspirations for everyone? Such statements don't offer much guidance for decision-making.
I'm a firm believer in refraining from criticism unless you've experienced it or have a better alternative to offer. So, if you have a fitting life goal, that's fantastic. Some individuals precisely know what they want to pursue in life by the age of 5.
What’s Your Life Purpose?
As a personal coach, the question I often encounter is, 'What's the next step?' Yet, before addressing that, I consistently ask, 'Where are you currently?' Understanding your present position is pivotal in charting the direction you need to pursue.
Times of confusion and feeling lost are familiar to us all. Often, people respond by contemplating new goals. However, true resilience lies in adaptability. Exploring our desires in life enables us to adapt. Despite the daily hurdles, the best path isn't always the one with the least resistance.
The forthcoming three-step method serves as a guide to discovering your life's aspirations. It has yielded success among my coaching clients, particularly those not entirely aligned with the idea of 'goals.' This adaptable process facilitates action-taking in response to shifting circumstances.
Three Steps to Determine Your Life Goal
1. Identifying Your Strengths
Here, I’m not talking about skills, as you can relatively easily learn any new skill. I'm talking about your rooted strengths, like perseverance, ambition, and optimism.
Here are a few questions to reflect on:
- Which personal qualities do I lean on during challenging times?
- What personal achievement am I most proud of?
- In what unique ways do I excel?
2. Increasing Your Passion
Notice I didn't say 'Follow your passion,' as that tends to stress me out, similar to 'life's purpose.' Instead, jot down activities, challenges, or topics that excite you and apply your strengths to those areas. Here are some questions to ask yourself:
- Where do I invest most of my mental energy in terms of thinking, reading, or exploring online?
- What activities could I engage in every day of the week without expecting financial compensation?
- What were the activities I deeply enjoyed as a child?
3. Focusing on Delivering Value
You'll only find the compass useful if you know where you stand on the Earth's surface. That means learning to identify problems and leveraging your strengths and enthusiasm to solve them. So seek ways to assist others, setting aside everything else. Here are some questions to ask yourself:
- What do people often seek me out for?
- What adversities have I encountered and successfully overcome in the past that might offer valuable lessons to others?
- What present challenges am I tackling independently that could later be used to aid others?
In Conclusion
Discover how to leverage your strengths, engage in what excites you, serve those in need, and then take one step forward aligned with what you aim to achieve in life.
Contemplating life's purpose may seem tempting, but what truly matters is making your time worthwhile. Stop the quest for life's ultimate goal and start living authentically.
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